It was a good Christmas and New Year's celebration. A nice balance between being at home together as an immediate family and spending time at large family gatherings. I think I'm becoming less of an extrovert because I'm beginning to relish the time at home puttering around. Or maybe because I work now I appreciate being at home....
Anyway, I was thinking a bit about 2013 and how the year has bee quite the year. If I could sum it all up in one word it would be Discernment. The year was full of crossroads and circumstances that demanded a lot of discernment in which way to go.
The year seemed to start off with much change and newness. I had just decided to go back to school, so I registered for my first course towards my post bacc. in Inclusive Education. It was a stretching experience for me and it was confirmed I was ready to get back into University studies. Just a few weeks after that, an opportunity came about that rocked out world; well, it could have, but at the time it was pretty big. A church in Brazil was inquiring if we would be interested in being the lead pastor. I must say, I was thrown into a bit of an emotional roller coaster. I had just gotten used to the idea of living back here, the cold weather wasn't too depressing and I felt like I was beginning to settle down. I love my neighbours, I had painting projects lined up, I was in school and so were the kids. I wasn't ready and yet I was so ready for another overseas adventure.
Discern we did and over a number of months we realized that this opportunity wasn't for us. And I had peace. Then a few weeks later, another church came a calling and this time we discerned over the summer it was where God wanted us to be. I see now how Brazil was preparing my heart. I do admit that there are times that I still would like to jet off, but I have come to embrace that as who I am now. I'm not running away, but God has placed in my heart (because of Bolivia no doubt) a readiness to be in another country. Maybe God has that in store for us, in the future.
The spring was also a discerning time for me as I contemplated going back to work full time. I was nervous and excited and wondering how it would all work out. Four months in I can say I am glad for the opportunity to expand my work outside the home. It has had it's challenges, that is for sure, but as one of my kids put it, "Mom, I'm glad that you have the chance to work at MCC because it's a great place for you to be." That meant a great deal to me to hear that because I always said if the family was miserable with me at work, I would put it aside and focus on my career inside my four walls. I have 30+ years before I can even think of cashing in my CPP, so what's the hurry if I take a sabbatical from the working world while my children are still young?
So I thought as I settled into my job and Carl anticipated a move to Fort Garry that we wouldn't be put in another situation that would demand much discernment, but we were. I was shoulder tapped and presented with another job, one I would have never considered, but soon after I began to seriously think about moving in the direction I was being encouraged to go. I cannot remember a time when I spent so much time in prayer and contemplation for what was the right thing to do as with this situation. It was a hard number of weeks as I submitted my resume and waited and got a call for an interview and then waited more and then had the interview and then waited even more only to find out I didn't get the job. I was disappointed, but I was not sorry for the process in the least. I grew so much and I learned so much about myself and all the people involved.
Maybe now life will become a bit more mundane and boring for the next while. I smile at how ridiculous that sounds! Already I have changed my course of study (I'm stepping up the intensity and I'll keep you posted), our kids are getting busier by the month and church involvement has only begun. Hmmmm....what will 2014 bring?
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