Before leaving Bolivia I was looking for the clearly defined path leading to our future. I was naively hoping that everything would be laid out. In reality I think we all know that isn't the case, no matter where or how we live our lives. Sigh.....darn it.
When I read this saying it was scary and intimidating, it made me feel lost and disoriented. And I have to admit I was angry at thinking someone could have the nerve to articulate the lack of path. What?! For pity's sake.....I want the straight road, like the one you have in Saskatchewan. Making no effort to steer because it's all right in front of me, never changing.
Ach, it can't be that easy or brain numbing. I actually have to put some effort into it. Since we've had very unique experiences, my path will most likely look nothing like yours. I can't run blazing into the field, no, I have to be patient and take deliberate steps. That is just so hard right now. I just want to run, I don't care the direction, but this slow is killing me. And in fact, there are days where I feel at a stand still. How can a path be made if I'm not moving, HELLO? I'm floating, drifting, not feeling like I'm going anywhere.
Not knowing when or where to plant my foot next, but trusting God will guide me in His time. That's what my brain is saying to my aching heart....
No comments:
Post a Comment