My thoughts Today

I haven't had a lot of time to sit and blog.  I was thinking I didn't really have any amazing event to post, and then I got to thinking that I would just sit and write.  I  may not have time to post pictures or make a cool collage or edit a video, but at least you'll get my thoughts.

In the beginning of the week, my thought was parting is just sorrow.  Where does the sweet come in?  When you figure you'll meet again?  That has nothing to do with the leaving part. We said goodbye to a family that we've grown really close to.  They came about 3 weeks before we did, and left about 2 weeks before our departure date.  Our kids are about the same age, and although we will see them again in August for a re-entry retreat, there is mourning and loss right now.  Why?

Well, this is how I see it.  We are in a place and a time for just a short while.  Each person in that space and time contributes to what I call The Blanket.  It's forever changing because people will come and go.  You leave, you take a corner of the blanket with you as a reminder of your experiences.  New people come and fill in the holes where the pieces were taken, but the blanket looks different.  Never can you have the same blanket, never can it stay the same and all you have left is that little snippet you managed to take before you leave.  And you tuck that in your memory box, with all the other pieces you  may have collected. At the end, you piece it all together into one huge blanket and proclaim, Here's my life!

So what I'm trying to say is when Lynn and Laurie left, they took a piece, leaving a hole, and their unique contributions were no longer there, just like the other people who have left.  We can never have it like it was here in Bolivia.  Never and never.  And that's okay, because life is all about changing.

People have changed us and we have them.  I'll be taking my piece soon enough too....

I'm packing my bags and panicking because I might not have room for all my stuff.  I have to take a bottle of my shampoo because the smell reminds me of here.  When I'm missing here, I want to smell something familiar.  Is that crazy?

Asha has to have her tacos.  She told me she'll wear them to the airport if she has to.  And you know what?  I bought these ridiculous high shiney tacos, and I think I might have to wear them too instead of stuffing them into my bag.  Gosh, don't laugh at me when I get off the plane, piled with 4 shirts (because I must take them all) and my dumb shoes.

I got obsessed with a picture project, but thankfully I can say it's done.  Carl called it my Project Crazy.  But since it turned out well, he's just calling me Crazy now.  I wanted to rent costumes here (it's about $3 per costume, crazy cheap, I know!!) of all 9 departments of Bolivia.  Dress my older three kids in 3 costumes each and take pictures at a photo studio of them all.  Elena, of course since she was born here and it's hard to find a costume for a 4 month old, wore a little cambita dress for all the pictures.  The photographer thought I was hilarious, which is different than crazy.  There I was (and Carl too was my assistant) changing all the kids, adjusting hats, fixing shoes and fabric etc.  Go! Go! Go! like it was some runway show.  But the pictures turned out amazingly well and the kids had a fun time (well, Asha wasn't super thrilled) getting dressed up.  Now I have a picture of each of them, covering the 9 departments.  When I picked up the pictures all the people behind the counter shouted, Son Bellas!!! and told me most likely the pictures would end up in some giant sized poster to display.  Crazy project, I know.  Worth it?  Vale la pena.

Did I mention I'm packing?  Ugh.  I hate sorting and I stood in front of a drawer for 10 minutes getting the nerve to just open it and sort through my junk.  But I did it.  Then I rewarded myself with 5 pieces of licorice.  It had to be 5 because that what was left in the package and I'm all about downsizing...okay do you get the irony?  I just figured it out now!

I'm taking lots of pictures, and doing a lot of hugging and kissing. 

Joel says that he'll keep his hair longer now that we're going back to Canada, to prepare for the cold.  I told him, it's summer there right now, and he looked at me and said, Yeah I know...summer in Canada is like winter in Bolivia.  So true.

p.s. because I'm crazy like that, if I scan the pictures, I might share them here before we leave.  If not, just come over to see them.  In a few weeks, most of you will be close enough!